i am

Lately I have been splurging like a mad woman on clothing and as shallow as it seems...I think I am beginning to find myself because I am no longer dressing for anyone else but myself. A lot of guys I liked or have been with pressured me to look a certain way and I always thought of myself as a person of change. I am not a person of change. I hate it I moved so much and grew up as a socially awkward freak.

Now that I have someone who finds me perfect the way I am, I can finally be myself. I've learned that I am: opinionated, loud yet quiet, commit random acts of cruelty and kindess, and that I can quite possibly be nice. Also, I look good in purple.

I have a distinct taste in literature  now. I do not read non-fiction anymore unless it is for school projects. I only read philosophy books and poetry. Most of my books make spiritual people feel uncomfortable so at times I feel bad, however their babbling aboud how I am going to go to hell evens things out.

I also am putting myself before others because how can you help others if you aren't even taking care of yourself. My education comes first now, and I am back on track in all my classes so hopefully I will exceed my own expectations.

Also, I realize who my true friends are, I have very few but quality over quantity. Most of my friends that are girls are airheads or two-faced. My male friends are horndogs.

The rest of the people I see are gutter material, others are gutter's gutter material. I only want positive influences in my life now.